" Is quitting always the solution?"

 

" Is quitting always the solution?"

(inspired by the sport that once broke me but also taught me to heal)

 

To me, losing means quitting even though- it's the thing I have done most.

I have done this not once but twice and it deeply kills me inside.

Whenever I remember it my chest throbs and my heart beats faster than a Etruscan Shrew . Slowly, tears start pouring down like a waterfall.

It hurts when you stop doing something you love.

It is more painful than others' insulting words or actions .

It is your actions that hurt more than other people's actions.

That is when you feel like a thousand arrows have found the bull's eye of your heart.

I have felt this - when I stopped playing Badminton.

I have loved this sport.

My soul revolved around it like the Moon revolving around the Earth.

Day and night. My mind , my body and my heart only stayed in that Badminton court.

Firstly it brought me joy because I was improving and winning in the sport.

That's when It suddenly stopped - after my opponent defeated me.

In the court, I acted all cool about losing, but only I could see that my heart was burning, slowly turning into ashes.

Ashes. Residue after burning.

Those remnants are still buried deep in my soul. These ashes caused mayhem in my mind, whenever I saw people playing that sport.

I stopped watching Badminton Tournaments and stopped playing in the court I called my second home.

Now, after five years , I still think about how naive and immature my thinking was.  

Some part of me still defends my 8 year -old self .

My coach tried really hard to make me love the sport, but  now I know his attempts were futile .

I never forgave myself for that one match.

Now, as I am getting mature. I have learned that losing is going to happen and I am not supposed to leave what I love at any cost.

If you love something then, be stuck with it like super glue

-  TEJASRI SAGAR LANKA